Feeling the love after sharing it

I don't generally talk about my beliefs regarding political, religious, or social issues in public. There are so many different opinions and strong feelings that conversations about such topics rarely remain civil. As a child, I was taught that discussing controversial issues in public just wasn't polite and should be avoided, and that lesson has carried into my adult life.

However, just because I don't talk about my opinions doesn't mean I don't have them, or that they aren't strong. I'm not an activist, but I believe in marriage equality. My natural inclination to keep mum is exacerbated by the fact that I'm living in an extremely conservative area of the South. And because I don't speak up about my opinions, I often don't know how people around me feel.

I went out on a limb yesterday and changed my Facebook profile picture to the Human Rights Campaign's pink and red logo in support of the marriage cases in the Supreme Court. I also shared an article about the logo and campign, a picture of my dog sporting a red bandana in support of marriage equality, and a status proclaiming my view of love.

Human Rights Campaign marriage equality graphic

I was the first of my Bible Belt-area Facebook friends to post anything supporting marriage equality, and I had no idea how people, including my boss, family, or friends, would respond. I nervously checked my Facebook every few minutes to see if there were any comments, specifically negative ones.

I was pleasantly surprised: not only were there no negative comments, there were many Likes and positive responses. A few people shared the article I posted, and many of my friends changed their profile picture to the Human Right Campaign red and pink logo.

Considering I had no idea what to expect, I was thrilled with the positive responses. It also felt good to know that, despite not talking about marriage equality with my local friends, many of them shared the same beliefs as me. It was great!

It also made me realize that maybe keeping my thoughts to myself isn't always the best decision. It can leave me feeling lonely and out of place, because I assume that no one thinks like I do. Not only do I feel alone, but the people around me who unknowingly share my beliefs may feel like no one agrees with them either.


 I saw the graphic to the left on Facebook about a month ago, and its message stuck with me. After my wonderful social media experience this week, I've decided that I'm going to find more opportunities to share my beliefs with my loved ones.

I won't do this with the intent to change minds, but to make people know where I stand. I want to foster healthy conversations with people who don't think like me with the hope that we can and will learn something from each other, and I want to let people who share my beliefs know that they aren't alone.

I'm tired of being afraid of what other people will say or think when I share my beliefs. I want people to know where I stand and know that, whether they share my beliefs or hold some others, I am willing to have a civil conversation and learn from their opinions without judgement. I know that courtesy probably won't always be extended to me, but I am going to make it a point to make a change. I believe that there is strength in diversity, and that not always agreeing with other people isn't necessarily a bad thing. 

People and Pets

Anyone who knows me knows that I am a huge animal lover. More than one person has hesitated to let me hold their beloved pet for fear that my extreme affection would cause me to inadvertently squeeze the life out of their fuzzy, adorable little creature. I have been likened to Elmira from Tiny Toons on more than one occasion, and it's not an entirely inaccurate comparison. I just want to love them and squeeze them and hug them to pieces!  Well, not exactly, but you get the idea.

Elmira

I can't explain why I love animals do much -- I just do. They're cute and adorable and would probably love you even if no one else in the world did. They're non-judgmental and sweet, and oh-so-nice to snuggle with. I think they're probably better than most people. In short, they're awesome!

I think pets, whether they be cats, dogs, birds, reptiles, or amphibians, can fill voids in peoples' lives, especially individuals who may not like or trust many other people. But they can also be wonderful additions to a family. My family, at least for the time being, consists of me, my husband, and my dog.

I got my dog, Penny, for my fourteenth birthday, and she has been both company to a lonely girl and a member of my family. I've had for for more than ten years, her entire life, and she means more to me than I can even express in words. She's laying next to me on the couch snoring right now, and I can't imagine living without her. I know some day I won't have her anymore, and the day she passes away is the day I will probably make my first visit to a mental institution.

Penny

I think everyone who has a pet should be as insanely in love with them as I am with Penny, but I know not everyone feels this way about their pets. If I had a dollar for every time I heard about or saw someone treat an animal, especially a pet, poorly, I would be rich. And I would like to think I would give that money to a good cause that benefits animals in need.

I have to remind myself that not everyone feels as strongly as I do, and that some people feel even stronger about how animals should be treated. I respect people who push for animal rights, and I really applaud those who practice vegetarianism or veganism. I'm not ready to make a drastic change in my diet or life, but I can take good care of the animals I have, encourage other people to do the same, and support more humane sources of food, like free-range farming.

So, readers, do you have a pet (or pets) that you're absolutely crazy about? If so, tell me about them! Then give them a hug for me :)

Hold Your Judgement

Something I have noticed in the last few years is how judgmental people can be towards each other. Ironically, it seems as though the people who complain about being ostracized for their appearance or beliefs are often the ones who judge other people the most severally. You would think people people with alternative lifestyles would be the most open-minded, but that isn't always true. I don't know how many times I have heard a very religious person complain that someone isn't devout enough, or how often I hear punk-minded individuals refer to other rockers as "posers." It's frustrating to hear someone wish for people to respect their choices in one breath, and in the next criticize someone else's decisions.

Maybe I'm noticing this because I'm getting older and growing up, but looking back over the last few years I realize I have unfairly judged people. I didn't have the easiest time growing up, and I unfairly judged people around me based on what was going on in my home. As a cheerleader, I was surrounded by pretty girls with successful families and seemingly happy home lives. It was frustrating to hear complaints about having to be home for dinner when the only hot meal I got all day came from the school cafeteria, and the idea of a daily family meal was altogether foreign. I would get angry when I would hear other girls talk about buying a dress for the Homecoming ceremony and another for the dance, because all the money I'd saved for the event had been stolen by a drug-addicted family member. I couldn't understand how so many of my peers were so short-sighted; how they couldn't see the people around them who had "real" problems.

I've come to realize that, however trivial their problems seemed to me, their problems were very real and important to them. For me to judge them so poorly and dismiss their issues was extremely unfair, because I didn't bother trying to see things from their point of view. With this lesson learned, I'm doing my best to not commit my past mistakes in my future, and I also wanted to share what I've learned with whoever may read my blog. So, if you find yourself determining that someone you've encountered isn't devout, cool, or troubled enough, please take a moment to look at things from their point of view and reassess your thoughts.